Recognizing One’s Heritage Through a Game with Nicole Wong
Founder of The Mahjong Project
“Just do the thing.” - Nicole Wong
The cacophony of chatter at a mahjong table is like a sudden downpour of golf ball-sized hail against the backdrop of captivating gossip.
Click clack click clack click clack…..Click…..clack…..shhhhh…shhhhh…shhhhhh…
BANG! BANG! ….…snap……bang bang bang……snap...click………..snap……………..clack.
If you happen to be under the same roof as four players gathered around this classic Chinese tile game, you are likely in for a multi-hour soundtrack of over a hundred polished pieces colliding like bumper cars in pure pandemonium (that is, segmented by moments of silent concentration). While most communities today play with tiles made of plastic, some have the privilege of delighting in antique mahjong sets carved from animal bone (usually cow) that have been passed down over generations. These are often accompanied by intricate house rules unique to one’s family or community of players (which range widely around the world, and specifically have a complex history in America).
For Nicole Wong, a multimedia storyteller and producer based in Oakland, the artifacts of mahjong come in the form of a dusty table and a forgotten set of tiles that once sat in her parent’s garage - waiting for the resurrection of bygone games - and a brainchild she calls The Mahjong Project.
Nicole shares one of her first inspirations for starting the project: watching the culminating mahjong scene in the film Crazy Rich Asians and feeling the full weight and meaning of the characters’ choices. In short, the scene depicts the protagonist Rachel Chu (seated in the “West” seat, symbolizing Western values as an Asian American) playing mahjong against her boyfriend’s mother Eleanor (seated in the “East” seat, symbolizing Eastern values of tradition as the matriarch of a wealthy Singaporean family). What transpires is a dance between these two characters, expertly juxtaposing the rules and hands of mahjong with the tension of cultural confrontation and empowerment. Through strategic gameplay and symbolism, the scene depicts Rachel’s intelligence, finesse, and determination to assert her identity in the face of societal norms - ultimately gaining Eleanor’s respect.
While Nicole asserts that knowing how to play mahjong is not a necessity to understanding this scene in the context of the movie, it certainly provides a more complex narrative. She shares: “My reaction when watching this scene was just: ‘DAANNG!!’ Rachel just had such an amazing hand.” While Nicole admits it feels silly that this was such an “aha moment” in her journey to document her family’s house rules for mahjong, it really solidified something more significant: “the importance of a commitment to telling Asian and Asian American stories through a multifaceted lens, and celebrating not only Asian and Asian American actors, but directors, movie reviewers, producers, and the whole ecosystem.”
The Mahjong Project
It is Christmas 2019 in Oakland, CA and Nicole is gathered with her family for a post-dinner game in the living room of her brother’s home. The South seat’s corner of the mahjong table (one of the four positions in mahjong) is haphazardly decorated with multi-colored Post-It notes.
Sitting in the corresponding seat, Nicole balances a yellow legal pad on her lap, and it wobbles like a see-saw each time she presses down with the ballpoint pen in her hand. Nicole’s mom is cooking in the kitchen but checking in on the game to see what’s happening.
She continues to scribble:
Chicken hand - fast and cheap.
Runs - no points except a full hand of runs.
Kong - what is this?
Special hands - purity hand, mahjong from a bonus tile…
Like a frazzled intern taking meeting minutes in a room of serious faces, Nicole attempts to note down the context and details of the game as it plays out: an array of mahjong hands, rules, exceptions to rules, tips to win, caveats, scoring math, beginner strategy, advanced strategy, lots of new vocabulary, and an ever-growing list of questions. One thing is for sure: the journey to each mahjong win is exceptionally nuanced and specific to every player’s style and tenure. After sporting a similar secretarial role at previous mahjong matches, though, Nicole is starting to get the hang of it.
At the end of the night, she gathers her field notes and transcribes them into a Google Drive folder titled: “Mahjong Stuff.” And there it is - another game in the books, and a snapshot of oral history uploaded to the cloud!
When I ask Nicole what spurred this meticulous process, she answers simply: “I realized one day that there will be a time when the elders in my family will not be around to lead the game. If I don’t learn and record the rules, this piece of my family history might be lost forever.” In fact, it is during a holiday weekend learning Castles of Burgundy (a German board game designed for 2-4 players) with her now-in-laws, sifting through the game’s rulebook, that she realizes the same thing could be done for mahjong - and that she could be the one to do it.
“I realized one day that there will be a time when the elders in my family will not be around to lead the game. If I don’t learn the rules, this piece of my family history might be lost forever.” - Nicole Wong
In October 2022, Nicole launched The Mahjong Project.
She reaches out to her friend Andria Lo, whom she has known for over a decade since being editors at Hyphen magazine - an indie Asian American magazine that covers art, culture & politics - and had recently reconnected with as members of The Ruby - an arts-and-letters community of nonbinary, transfeminine, and women-identified creatives in San Francisco. Together, they orchestrate one of the most beautiful, fun, and transformative photoshoots featuring all sorts of mahjong paraphernalia. Think: avant garde art installation meets interactive playground and cultural bonanza - composed of delicate dinnerware, traditional Cantonese dim sum, mahjong tiles and game pieces, terracotta pottery, tchotchkes everywhere, porcelain kettles, and antique mahjong furniture.
As intended, the photoshoot elevated the experience of these everyday objects of her culture and of mahjong. Nicole remembers thinking that “[the project] suddenly felt so personal.”
Following the photoshoot, Nicole began to ideate on the face of the project: a website. By December 2022, Nicole’s scrappy Google Doc had evolved into The Mahjong Project website, a labor of love by Nicole and an ensemble of creative powerhouses including Andria Lo (photographer), Daphne Wu (web designer), and Helen Shewolfe Tseng (illustrator). The result of the site is an approachable and engaging platform that breaks down all the basics of the game: How to Play, Objectives, Components, Setup, Basics, Strategy, Scoring, Mahjong Hands, and Glossary & FAQ. Woven throughout the site are also tips, fun anecdotes, diagrams, and suggestions on how to have the most fun.
Daphne Wu shares that she is immediately intrigued by the vision for the project. In addition to thinking through the website’s layout, she commits to perfecting the site’s visual identity: “I had no background in mahjong, but loved the idea immediately. Using the amazing photography by Andria Lo as a starting place, [Nicole and I] decided that the design would be a throwback to our Chinese heritage and center on being funky, fun, and fresh. I then played around with the traditional color scheme of Nicole and Andria’s family mahjong sets, featured in the photos.” Notably, by the website’s launch date, Daphne’s curiosity for mahjong piques and she even decides to bring her own set to an upcoming family reunion to face off with her cousins. She is now a regular mahjong player.
Gradually, Nicole also crafts a social media presence (@themahjongproject), sharing highlights from mahjong gatherings at home and in the wild. She asks her friends, family, and strangers to share their mahjong stories, and uses it as a platform to help intentionally craft inclusive spaces in the Bay Area for people to play the game and connect.
Importantly, Nicole makes it clear from the get-go that the rules, strategies, and etiquette she shares through the project are specific to her family, and not meant to be the “official” or only way to play mahjong. Understanding that there are countless ways to play, this interpretation of the rules is merely her family’s special recipe.
Family & Cultural Ties
Speaking of family, Nicole comes from a line of Chinese New Zealanders whose love for board games has been more or less shaped by the necessity to be indoors during the colder months on the island. Graham Wong, Nicole’s father, recalls mahjong games in his childhood: “among the Chinese households, having people over and going to different people’s homes was second nature…and games of mahjong were [mostly] incidental.”
Upon retirement, his father (Nicole’s grandfather), Bill, served as a mahjong instructor at the local adult school in Dunedin, New Zealand. He would often start class with an excerpt from an old rulebook: “We Chinese have played Mah Jong one way for a thousand years, but you foreigners have played it a thousand ways in one year.” In reality, the version of mahjong now known as Chinese Mahjong (recognized by the State Sports Commission of China starting in 1998), is the fusion of myriad rules that were alive and well in different regions of China (e.g., Fujian Mahjong plays with no dragons, Hong Kong/ Cantonese Mahjong scores slightly differently, and Sichuan Mahjong only uses the suited tiles).
Despite this generational tie with mahjong, Nicole did not learn to play until her early twenties. Her parents immigrated to the United States in the early 1980s, and she was born in the Bay Area before shortly relocating to Los Angeles, CA, where she spent a happy childhood as the youngest of three kids. In LA, her family moved to Santa Monica on the West side, a predominantly white neighborhood, but close to her dad’s two first-cousins and their families - also Chinese New Zealanders. But, between weekend soccer, swimming lessons, ceramics classes and music recitals, mahjong did not make it onto the weekend social calendar.
It was actually Nicole’s grandparents, Bill and Ivy Wong, who taught Nicole how to play. They were both avid players. During Nicole’s month-long visit to New Zealand after college graduation, she accompanied them in the slower activities of life: cooking, cleaning, and watching the local news. But then, the pace would pick up when playing mahjong.
To Nicole, that summer was a once in a lifetime opportunity to deepen her ties with her New Zealand and Chinese roots, as well as an important piece of her family story. Unbeknownst to her, it not only planted the early seeds of The Mahjong Project, but also the revival of mahjong in her family's American life (where the game had become dormant in the fabric of her parents’ acclimation to a new home and land).
In Graham Wong’s own words, “With Nicole being more interested in the game and asking more questions, it spurred [my wife and I] to call up old friends we had not seen in 10 years to meet for a game of mahjong. In many ways, I am so delighted by what she is doing.” He adds: “We are actually gathering for a family vacation next week and the first thing on the list is to bring a mahjong table!”
And so just like that, these game pieces serve as stepping stones for connection across generations - bridging tradition, growing community, and - oftentimes - carrying light.
Graham Wong paints vividly an image of his mother in the last years before her passing: “During the last couple decades of her life, my mother was very sedentary and mostly just went through the motions of life in a slow, blurry manner. This was particularly the case after my father passed away. But, whenever the mahjong table came out, there would be a sudden shift. It was as if she shed 25 years off her age! The familiarity, excitement, and community of the game gave her an undeniable spark.”
A Growing Community
When asked how mahjong has enriched Nicole’s everyday livelihood and sense of community, she replies quickly that “it is pretty fluidly incorporated into my life now.”
“[The project] has offered me the opportunity to meet a ton of great people, and also to connect me further to my culture.” She adds: “I end up in [Oakland's] Chinatown more often now to interview people, and look around for props and inspiration.” We both share smiles that acknowledge a shared experience of wandering the streets of Chinatown, and an understanding of our hyphenated identities.
She is also delighted to hear that her website has been immensely useful to many who are trying to learn how to play mahjong, or are trying to teach friends and neighbors.
Michelle Yee, an artist and writer in San Francisco, shares that she first met Nicole during an oral history workshop at The Ruby community space and soon became a regular at The Ruby’s mahjong nights. “Because my parents always played at home, the sound of [mahjong] tiles are imprinted in my brain. However, my grandmother refused to teach me since it was a form of gambling,” she describes. This is actually a very common reason why many Asian Americans never receive Mahjong lessons from their elders - including why my parents never taught me.
Just last year, in May 2023, Michelle played her first game, and remembers taking these baby steps in the most welcoming environment - among friends of The Mahjong Project. “Nicole was so friendly, open, and approachable in her way of teaching and sharing her passion for the game - especially her way of listening to and learning from others.” Viscerally, Michelle recalls feeling a cathartic connection. “When I played my first game, I felt the blood of my ancestors and their rich tradition of playing tile games flow through me.” The experience was profound.
“The sound of the tiles are imprinted in my brain. And, when I played my first game, I felt the blood of my ancestors and their rich tradition of playing tile games flow through me.” - Michelle Yee
In addition to building relationships within Nicole’s immediate community, The Mahjong Project has also enhanced her understanding of the broader community. It gives her an entry point to start talking to people and ask them questions about their lives and family history, through the lens of mahjong.
The Mahjong Project in 2024
What is Nicole and The Mahjong Project embracing in 2024?
Nicole will continue to create space for the game to be enjoyed, learned, and shared in her community. Historically, she has hosted Mahjong Nights at The Ruby, the restaurant Mamahuhu, Jade Chocolates Teahouse and Cafe, and street festivals including Joy on Joice and the Portola Autumn Moon Festival, with more events in the works such as at the art gallery Edge on the Square in San Francisco Chinatown.
Most recently, Nicole also announced that she is writing a book (to be released in Spring 2025 with Hardie Grant North America). It will be an “illustrated guide to mahjong play and mahjong culture - past and present” and Nicole will be teaming up again with Andria Lo whose beautiful photography work will accompany the words. So, much like the jubilant hubbub of a mahjong game, the next chapter of Nicole’s creative endeavor promises to be a dynamic blend of surprise, anticipation, and excitement.
As I wrap up my conversation with Nicole, she shares that she is actually off to pick-up some printed mahjong materials from the copy shop, and then to submit a draft of the book’s outline to her editor. And, that is all the cue I need to get out of her way and let her get back to the music of a writer’s notebook and keyboard.
Tap tap tap tap…tap…rustle…rustle
Thud! Ssssnatch! Tap tap tap tap…
Thank you for reading! If you or someone you know would like a helping hand in their mahjong pursuits, check out The Mahjong Project and everything Nicole has going on in the San Francisco Bay Area and beyond. For more on the history and background of Mahjong, Nicole recommends Mahjong: A Chinese Game and the Making of Modern American Culture by Annelise Heinz.
Happy community building!
What a fantastic read! I love how you’ve weaved multiple stories into this mahjong piece ~ 🀄️🀄️🀄️